Fake baby

Abigail is the perfect baby when people come over and visit. No crying. No yelling. No threats of violence or talk of baby prison. She sleeps or looks at whoevers holding her with big pretty eyes.

I feel their judgement as they sit there holding the kid." Oh, you're tired from this? This perfectly quiet baby thats not trouble at all? For shame sir."

Telling guests that your little girl is just faking is frowned upon in the etiquette books I've read, so I let it slide.Thats not to say she's a bad baby. Aside from her troubled past, shes mostly a joy.

But jeez, the way she flips a switch for guests. Amazing. I was trying, in vain, to calm her down this weekend when my Dad called to come visit. As soon as I said " Sure, come on over Dad" Abby brightened up and stopped fussing. The same thing happened when my cousins came over. Crying baby then BAM: Perfect angel baby.



Grandpa time. Will start screaming
in five minutes



With Cousin Sarah. Will yell
for an hour after they leave

Maybe tank is polite enough to not fire all guns in front of guests. Maybe we're just boring her. Shes either faking it for guests or we're really bad at this.